I had my dreams torn to pieces
Someone let all my hopes down
I was wrong when I believed

But you were there
You held my hand
Let me know
That it wasn't my loss
I could do so much better

I fell down
I didn't know where to go
But you came along
Picked me up

Now your helping sow my dreams back together
Go back out there and try again
Because next time I'll do so much better

You held me up
When I thought I was going to drown
But now I know I can swim on my own
I'll continue to move on

Perfection is Boring

I know all my imperfections
I know I'm crazy and coo coo
But you can't change that in me

I know all my weaknesses
I know I have trouble letting go
But I don't want to change

I've got to be myself
Because perfection is boring
And without weaknesses and failures
You'll never learn

So stop trying to change me
Just let me be me

I may not have very many friends
But the ones I have are true
I may not always come in first place
But I always manage to finish the race

Let me be me
Just the way I am
Let me be me
All my imperfections and weaknesses
Let me be me

Crazy Maze

Crazy as a maze
Being spun all around
I never know where I'm going
Or if I'll ever get there

Never knowing if this path will lead to a dead end
If I'll have to turn around yet again

Sometimes I don't even know the direction I'm going in
But I've got to keep moving
I can't stay in one spot for long

My life is crazy as a maze
Being spun all around
Sometimes there are trap doors
Sometimes short cuts
I never know where I'm going
Or if I'll ever get there
But I just keep moving on.


Pic By:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/hanne_exurban/ / CC BY-NC 2.0

"Something for the Pain"

Leslie Nuchow

I found this song and it said so much about how I feel. Her music really makes you think. I don't like all of it but I fell in love with this song.

The sky is purple
Like a bruise
And I lie beneath it
Counting all the dreams I fear I’ll loose
And I’m not certain where I stand
My legs falter what I need is a hand
I just want something for the pain
I just need something for the pain
I numb to nothing
Then I wonder where I’ve gone
These bloodless veins
Won’t carry a song
There must be something
Under this
O mercy come to me and give me your kiss
I just want something for the pain
I just need something for the pain
Oho this weight from my soul
Oho ‘cause I do believe inside it I am whole
Oho carve an answer in my mouth
Oho so I can open up
I will open up
I will open up and let it out
Yeaha yeaha
I just want something
Just get me something
I just want something
Just give me something

Why can't I just let things be
Why can't I just let go
Is it because you let me down
Is it because I let myself hope

Things will never be the way I wanted
Because we had too many different expectations
That we are both unwilling to change

So why can't I just let it be
Why most my mind wander into this place
The place I try to forget
To pretend you don't exist

I'm working my way through this pain
Of feeling unwanted
Because I could it could never be

I let my hopes rise
But you brought them down
So why can't I just let things be

I'm Not That Girl

I'm not that Girl
I can't act that why
Does it surprise you
That I'm not that way
Did I ever lead you to believe otherwise
Because I'm not that girl

I'm just not that way
I never wanted to be
Can't things just be simple
Can't things just be pure
Because that's the girl I am

I want you to know me
I want you to respect me
But you want me to be
Someone I could never be
I'm not that girl
I could never pretend to be

Am I an Idealist
Do I expect to much
Can't you just except me
The me I want to be
Pure and simple

I can't be the girl you want me to be
I can't act in that way
I've got my own expectations
I can't let myself down
I am NOT that Girl
And I will never be

"Let it Be Me"

Ray LaMontagne-
now i remember all to well
just how it feels to be all alone
you feel like youd give anything
for just a little place you can call your own
thats when you need someone, someone that you can call
and when all your faith is gone
feels like you cant go on
let it be me
let it be me
if its a friend you need
let it be me
let it be me

So my emotions seem to resemble a crazy rollercoaster mind. I tell myself that something doesn't bother me and for a short time I start to belive, then out of no where those feelings come rushing back, laughing at me. Not knowing what to do. I realized though today that while I have always been sure of myself and who I am, I am starting to feel secure in who I am. I know what I want, what I deserve and I'm not going to let anyone treat me disrepectfuly. I also feel as though I am growing up and learning to do things on my own. I have so much more in life to learn, so many more battles to fight. How I am fighting seems to be changing. I'll be graduating in less than a year and I have no idea what I'm doing with my life after I walk across that stage. Where will I work, will it be in the communication field, will it be something I love, where will I live, will I choose a job because its the only offer or because its what I want. Today I've worked through many of my problems, I know that the future is uncertain, but God has a plan for me. He'll lead me through this life without a map.

I'm looking towards the future
I'm running to the finish line
But what will I do once I've cross it
What will be my new future

There is so much more I want to do
So many dreams that haven't come true

I've worked so hard to get to where I am
But what will I do now
Where will this new road lead

I'm looking towards the future
I'm running to the finish line
But what will I do once I cross it
Where will this new race lead me?

You keep asking if I'm okay
I just wish you'd let me be
I've got to get through this on my own

I hate being so vulerable
The fact the I let someone in
I let someone hurt me

You keep asking if I'm okay
But I just want to forget
For it all to go away

So I act like I don't care
Hoping you won't worry
Hoping that if I act well enough
I may even believe it myself

You keep asking if I'm okay
Don't you know
That your just reminding me
That I'm not okay

When times got hard
There you were
You pulled me out of the dark
With just one word from you
I feel alright

I didn't know what to say
To explain how I felt
But that's okay
Because you understood
You know me

You kept the bad
From pulling me under
You brought in the light
You brought back the laughter

When times got hard
There you were
You pulled me out of the dark
With just one word from you
I feel alright